Where did summer go?

Time sneaked up on me so quickly that it’s already the 2nd last week of July! Yet I am still waiting for summer to start in Vancouver, or did it already pass me by without saying hello or goodbye?

Seems like the rest of Canada is enjoying the sun in shorts and t-shirt, but I’m still wearing a knit sweater and jeans, peddling my bike with wind and rain that sends shiver down my spine.

I have been very busy for the past months planning a wedding for my friends. August is definitely the wedding month, and the date we originally chosen was already fully booked. So August 14th it is then, which in Chinese sound like “don’t die”, so I guess that’s better than my birthday (8-15) that sounds like “don’t want me”, lol.

Then came the decorations and flowers, chairs and table, archway and chuppa, guest list and cake. I decided to meet the decorator in North Delta by bus, which turned out to be quite the ride. I missed their stop at 116th street and went all the way to 161. Then the bus going back was the last one for the day! Luckily the decorator gave me a ride back to the sky train station. I was exhausted, but glad that all the details were set.

Later that week we met at Stanley Park to do a walk through, and settled on where to place everything. I can’t imagine organizing a wedding for 200+ people and how that would be like! The decorator said she knew a couple who broke up the day before their $10,000 wedding due to stress and issues with planning! Then there’s also the post wedding/honeymoon blues befall on many brides.

Weddings are a big deal to many people, especially the bride. It is a day where she gets to dress up as a princess, and have everyone’s attention focused solely on her. All the planning has become a part of her life, and suddenly after the wedding she’s dragged back to reality and it’s all gone, making her feel empty and sometimes depressed.

One of the problems is expectations. Somehow with all the Disney movies and love stories, we expect to “live happily ever after” after a fairy tale wedding.  When reality hit, it hits really hard.

Marriage is celebration of two people willing to work hard and create a life together. It is not a magic potion that miraculously solve all your problems and issues. Whatever problems you had before will still be there, and maybe even magnified.

So always stay true to yourself, and remember that you are marrying for the person, not for the wedding or the gorgeous wedding photos! : )

Fingers crossed that it won’t rain on August 14!

When will we learn from our mistakes?

I am lactose intolerant. This means I drink soy milk and avoid all dairy products. Even the slightest milk in my hot chocolate makes my stomach turn and leave me feeling sick for the rest of the day.

I picked my cousins up from the airport today and spent the day walking around Granville island and downtown beaches. It was very hot and sunny, and I really wanted ice cream. My cousin got me the Fudge Cup, and it hit right on the spot while it lasted.

After a couple of minutes, I started to feel my stomach rumble, and the diary part definitely did not agree with me.

Later as I was heading home, David called, and I told him about my sick stomach. He thought for a moment and asked, why do you keep on doing things that will make you feel sick?

I had no answer, it’s like we forget the pain once the scab heals.

Is that just a human weakness? It’s like why do we eat junk food even know we know it’s not healthy?

Why do we tend to make decisions that will hurt us in the long term, just for a mere short term fulfillment?

I remember the story of the mini shark, where he is put into a tank with a fish on the other side. He wants to eat the fish, but there’s a panel of glass in between them. He bumps and smashes into the panel, and finally gives up after many tries. Later when they removed the panel, he still stays on his own side, not wanting to get hurt again.

How many tries does it take for us to learn, and how many times do I have to get a sick stomach to stop eating diary products? Are the consequences of feeling sick not enough to drill it into my head? When can we actually learn from our mistakes and move forward, and not get side tracked by all the temptations?

What about the people in our lives that we see as friends and partners, when all they do is hurting us with words and actions? Do we have enough courage to stand up to them and protect ourselves?

I hope to have enough perseverance and determination to do what is good for myself, and keep away from what hurts.

Non violence. Ahimsa.

How many social networking sites do we need?

When it comes to social networking, how many is too many?

Facebook changed the way we connect with people, and twitter changed the way we broadcast our lives to others.

Now there is Google+, the new networking site from Google. The hype around Google+ has almost gone viral, with everyone and anyone asking for an invite just to test it out. It has gone so crazy that Google has seized all invitations, and so sadly, I am not one of the cool people to get a first sneak peek at it.

However, it really got me thinking, do we need all these social networking sites in our lives? Are they really helping us to connect with our friends, or are they creating more distance between us and the real society?

This reminded me of cellphones. More and more capabilities are added onto our basic phone. Texting, camera, games, agenda, alarm clock, music player, video player, and now it acts even as a mini PC with its own operating systems. There was once upon a time when we had to carry a different tool for each of these functions, and now they are all included in our handy little cellphone.

Then came the news of people being chained to their cellphones, not being able to get away from work because it’s always there, right by your side, emails and phone calls you can’t avoid. So, is it a blessing or a curse?

These are great inventions, making our lives easier and more convenient, but instead of sitting in front of a computer all day and connecting with your friends, how about actually getting together with them and do something? Social networking sites are great ways to update your friends on what you have been up to lately, so that when you do meet, you can discuss more in detail.

There are always strengths and weaknesses in everything, including ourselves as human beings. The key to the puzzle is finding balance with everything you do. Sounds simple but it’s actually very difficult to achieve. I have been struggling with it for all my life, but with the help of yoga and meditation, I think I might be getting a bit closer.

To balance, and inner peace.

Namaste.

p.s. I just want an all encompassing networking site that works, so I don’t have to add everyone again and again for every new thing that pops up,  just like having a cellphone that can handle everything and anything. Is that too much to ask?